The Blues

It's been three days of laying in bed in my pajamas. I usually don't have my three days off in a row. Too much time to think and wallow and be sad. I had to type a letter to my senator who is investigating the negligence in K's death. It was very painful to type. I had to start from the beginning to the end. After I typed it and mailed it out along with the release of his medical records, I was emotionally drained. I talked to my mother and my son who I share my home with. My son hates it here, even though he is making the most of it. The health care in Georgia is horrible. My mom is having a horrible time. No doctors in this little rural town accept Medicaid. She is having a hell of a time getting her health care. Baltimore has it's faults but the health care there was phenomenal. So yes, our rent is dirt cheap, but what have we traded? There is no price you can put on someone's death, but I think I am at the point of switching from hurt to anger. So we made a family plan to bank all of our money and hopefully find a new place to live after the first of the year. It's too painful to come home to this house, plus we have a two year lease which will be up next December. I am in limbo right now and am just waiting for some inner light to guide me to make my next move. So that is where I have been for three days, nestled under my covers, feeling sorry for myself. Back to work today, so time to put on my happy money making game face.