Sep 30, 2009

My first day out.....

Today is a big day for me. Doctors, job hunting etc. I am weary of boxes and bubble wrap. I have Kenny's urn on the built in wall shelf next to my bed. ( I like that feature, lots of space for books, nick-knacs etc. I woke up this morning and looked at that urn. We used to rent this house. In 2003. Now I am here with our son. Jesse was disgruntled at first. "I don't want to rent a basement apartment". Now he is coming around, the more it looks like a home. He got to see all his little girlfriends. I shall see my girlfriends today. I learned that home is where you do lay your head. Jesse and I are together. We have cable tv, internet and gas and electric all included in our rent. Everytime he call this his house I remind him who pays the bills. He gets that grim look on his face. I just want him to realize that coming up with the bill money every month is no joke. He is talking cellphones, school and work, in that order. God to be 19. He is overcoming Kenny's death very privately, in his own way. Kenny was not his biological father. He raised him since he was four months old. So to me, that was his father. Kenny was the more stable parent during the addiction years. It has taken J a lonnnnggg time to learn that my word is good. Kenny taught him the ultimate life lesson. All a man has in this world is his word and his balls. Jesse believes in this. Jesse has a very strong belief in God. That is the one thing we share. Free will, choices and faith. I think that is a good foundation for new beginnings. God Bless All..

Sep 29, 2009

That was also a rather beautiful sign...

You gotta love those little ratty motels off the side of 95. The clerks don't speak a lick of English, they do know the correct color of paper. It must be green. That musty room was a godsend. We are down to about 5 more boxes. I must be one sick chick, because the first thing I did was hook up my computer. Addiction? I mean achoo. God bless me. This move was so brutal. We didn't plan on moving so soon since we thought we were settled in Georgia. Wrong! So much stuff. Too much stuff. Our little basement apt is starting to look like our home. I literally can't do anymore tonight. I am done. I have to get up early. I have a few job interviews that I want to check out before I sign my name in blood at Denny's. Both are right across the street from my house. I could walk to work. That is the intriguing part. Plus, I am cheap and don't want to pay for gas. Less of a carbon imprint and whatnot. I try to do my part. I must lay down on the bed and close my eyes. I am content but exhausted. Thanks to all who kept me in their prayers. I will update comments and hit every one's blog in the early am. when I am at my best. Peace to all.

Sep 28, 2009

The most beautiful sign in the world

We made it. Jesse, Auggie and I. Baggy Pants and I saw that sign and gave a big high five. I never thought I could miss this place so much. We are not living in a palace but it is a place we know and are familiar with. I learned quite a bit from my adventure in the south. I learned that I prefer the realness of the urban streets and people. It is where for now I guess I belong. Who knows what the world has in store for me in a few years? We are worn out. Gonna finish unloading the truck tomorrow morning. Ugh...My boy can drive. He drove the whole way up. He got to see his little girlfriends. I think that alone cheered him up immensely. So now we are making this little apartment a home for now. The future is full of surprises. My landlord was true to his word. My tv and computer were already to be plugged in the moment I arrived. That made me happy. Doesn't take much to please me. I am a low maintaince chick. Thank God. Thank God for getting us up here safe and in one piece. Still have my glove, scarves and winter coat. My dog is curled up asleep. I just took a shower to wash the road off of me. Thanks for all the encouragement. I am beat. The bed is calling and I am answering. I am home. Peace to all of you. We made it.