Oct 28, 2009
Rock The Nation
Song by Michael Franti....I posted this because this man captured everything I feel pretty much about the state of our global political times. This is poetry to me. People need to listen. (Plus, I am too lazy to really sit down and write something that required this much thought)
We livin' in a mean time and an aggressive time
a painful time, a time where cynicism rots to the vine
in a time where violence blocks the summer shine
lifetimes, go by in a flash
in search for love, in search for cash
everybody wanna be some fat tycoon
everybody wanna be on a tropic honeymoon
nobody wanna sing a little bit out of tune
or be the backbone of a rebel platoon
it's too soon to step out of line
you might get laughed at you might get fined
but do you feel me when I say I feel pain everyday
when I see the way my friends gotta slave
and never get ahead of bills they gotta pay
no way no way!
some make a living doing killing Colombian penicillin
some are willing to play the villain they just chillin'
to pass the time, pass the information
or pass the wine
pass the buck or pass the baton
but you can't pass the police or the pentagon
the I.R.S. or the upper echelon
I think it's time to make a move on the contradiction
(chorus)
Bam-Bam, rock the nation
take over television and radio station
Bam-Bam the truth shall come
give the corporation some complication!
This is the dawning of our time I say it one more time
to emphasize the meaning of my rhyme
to rise above all the dirt and grime
add the right spice at the right time
fuck the constitution
are we part of the solution or are we part of the pollution
sittin' by and wonderin' why,
things ain't the way we like to find them to be, to be
for you and for me the people over there and the ones in between
check our habitation are we a peace lovin' nation
peace lovin' nation
I have a reasonable doubt I think I'll just spell it out
there's no need to scream or to shout
the N.R.A. just bought a man's soul
then he jumps up and shouts gun control
the government says that killin's a sin
unless you kill a murderer with a lethal syringe
so I ask again "are we peace lover's then"
some of them slang guns when they six years old
some of them end up in some six foot hole
this whole #### place seems to, lost control
so I raise my voice before I lose my soul
(chorus)
This is the way I'll express my feelings
vibe revealed and revolved spinnin on a record y'all
try to confiscate take what I communicate with
it's ancient gift of the lip steady creating
activating passin vocal vibrations to the blind plus the seeing
human doesn't mean just being
be coming don't believe it just belife it
belongings or beloved rehearse it or recite it
while shining drop your guns and move your tongues
battle motivation in no time lyrics come
sometimes fun others run their mouth or away
my mind co beaming like an early sunray
one day we'll get the picture and all combine
less the talking bout mines is mine and become one mind
every piece of the puzzle has its place
to build the piece of the puzzle called the human race
taking it long enough we crush the formal journalistic
dyslexic critters talk backwards to rap words
I'm sure raising my hands with questions and demands
statements and a plan with a map of the land
(chorus)
We livin' in a mean time and an aggressive time
a painful time, a time where cynicism rots to the vine
in a time where violence blocks the summer shine
lifetimes, go by in a flash
in search for love, in search for cash
everybody wanna be some fat tycoon
everybody wanna be on a tropic honeymoon
nobody wanna sing a little bit out of tune
or be the backbone of a rebel platoon
it's too soon to step out of line
you might get laughed at you might get fined
but do you feel me when I say I feel pain everyday
when I see the way my friends gotta slave
and never get ahead of bills they gotta pay
no way no way!
some make a living doing killing Colombian penicillin
some are willing to play the villain they just chillin'
to pass the time, pass the information
or pass the wine
pass the buck or pass the baton
but you can't pass the police or the pentagon
the I.R.S. or the upper echelon
I think it's time to make a move on the contradiction
(chorus)
Bam-Bam, rock the nation
take over television and radio station
Bam-Bam the truth shall come
give the corporation some complication!
This is the dawning of our time I say it one more time
to emphasize the meaning of my rhyme
to rise above all the dirt and grime
add the right spice at the right time
fuck the constitution
are we part of the solution or are we part of the pollution
sittin' by and wonderin' why,
things ain't the way we like to find them to be, to be
for you and for me the people over there and the ones in between
check our habitation are we a peace lovin' nation
peace lovin' nation
I have a reasonable doubt I think I'll just spell it out
there's no need to scream or to shout
the N.R.A. just bought a man's soul
then he jumps up and shouts gun control
the government says that killin's a sin
unless you kill a murderer with a lethal syringe
so I ask again "are we peace lover's then"
some of them slang guns when they six years old
some of them end up in some six foot hole
this whole #### place seems to, lost control
so I raise my voice before I lose my soul
(chorus)
This is the way I'll express my feelings
vibe revealed and revolved spinnin on a record y'all
try to confiscate take what I communicate with
it's ancient gift of the lip steady creating
activating passin vocal vibrations to the blind plus the seeing
human doesn't mean just being
be coming don't believe it just belife it
belongings or beloved rehearse it or recite it
while shining drop your guns and move your tongues
battle motivation in no time lyrics come
sometimes fun others run their mouth or away
my mind co beaming like an early sunray
one day we'll get the picture and all combine
less the talking bout mines is mine and become one mind
every piece of the puzzle has its place
to build the piece of the puzzle called the human race
taking it long enough we crush the formal journalistic
dyslexic critters talk backwards to rap words
I'm sure raising my hands with questions and demands
statements and a plan with a map of the land
(chorus)
Oct 26, 2009
Forgiveness
Jesse and I had our moment last night. We watched a movie called GhostTown late last night. It had a widow in it. I was sobbing. He said mom, "Please don't interuppt me and let me speak"..so I listened. He said mom when you were doing drugs you were very selfish. Kenny did drugs too, but he always bought food and paid the rent first. You would disappear a few times. He got in my bed and sat down. He said "Kenny loved you so much and put up with alot. I never thought you loved him as much as he loved you". I thought you were selfish." He said
"Since he died and I see you cry almost once a day or every other day, I realize you really loved him just as much as he loved you. I told Jesse of course I loved Kenny, he was my best friend. I said some of the things I did during my addiction weren't because I didn't love Kenny or him, it was because I was literally insane from the tremendous drug use. I always worked. Finally the cards had collapsed and there was a two year period where I just simply would hustle whatever to get drugs 24 hours a day. That was a very rough period in our family as Kenny was working everyday. Jesse remembers. Than we talked about all the good things about our family. It told him that yes, we are roommates, but I am your mother. You must not speak to me the way you do your friends. He said he gets scared because Kenny would keep me in check. Kenny was 10 years older and way more mature than I still am. Kenny was in charge of all monies etc. Jesse said he did that out of love to protect me from myself. I can turn into a very self destructive person. Kenny knew it. Jesse said he wants to know that he can count on me. The kid just figured out how much I loved his father last night. We talked til 3am. He forgave me in his own way. He doesn't have deep conversations that much. But when he does they are quite a doozy. We all love our children. I just hope they all know how much we truly do. Have a blessed and happy day. My heart is a little bit lighter today.
"Since he died and I see you cry almost once a day or every other day, I realize you really loved him just as much as he loved you. I told Jesse of course I loved Kenny, he was my best friend. I said some of the things I did during my addiction weren't because I didn't love Kenny or him, it was because I was literally insane from the tremendous drug use. I always worked. Finally the cards had collapsed and there was a two year period where I just simply would hustle whatever to get drugs 24 hours a day. That was a very rough period in our family as Kenny was working everyday. Jesse remembers. Than we talked about all the good things about our family. It told him that yes, we are roommates, but I am your mother. You must not speak to me the way you do your friends. He said he gets scared because Kenny would keep me in check. Kenny was 10 years older and way more mature than I still am. Kenny was in charge of all monies etc. Jesse said he did that out of love to protect me from myself. I can turn into a very self destructive person. Kenny knew it. Jesse said he wants to know that he can count on me. The kid just figured out how much I loved his father last night. We talked til 3am. He forgave me in his own way. He doesn't have deep conversations that much. But when he does they are quite a doozy. We all love our children. I just hope they all know how much we truly do. Have a blessed and happy day. My heart is a little bit lighter today.
Oct 25, 2009
A day off and some American Pie
This is my day off. I know the weeks ahead are going to be filled with work and weariness, but that is a good thing. I am employed, actually at two jobs. I am going to drop the 7-11 as she did not honor her agreement of 32 hours a week. I am using my inner gut feeling. The owner of Denny's said he will take care of me and I believe him.
American Pie is a very special record to me. It was the first 45 I bought. Actually my dad bought it for me. I had a Mickey Mouse record player. I think I was 5. I LOVED this song when I was little. My father died in '05, but everytime I hear this song, he comes back to me. Us singing in the car this song at the top of our lungs all off key and so what? These memories are what make me perservere. I quote some rather odd folks..Today it is Gloria Gaynor. I will survive...Enjoy your Sunday.
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