Jun 1, 2009

R.I.P. KENNETH LEE RICKELS

The suffering ended this morning. 09/29/1957-06/01/2009 He is now in God's embrace.


9 comments:

the walking man said...

Lori, I am firmly committed to the belief and have great faith that Kenny rests well and comfortably in the place of his ancestors.

While the knowledge is scant comfort to them left behind my prayers now are centered on you and Jess, May you find the strength to love and go through the next days determined to find the starting point of this new road ahead of you.

Kenny had a very fine last few months in that he was given a new sight for his sore eyes, a place that he could rest and sit on a porch contemplating calm waters and not the trouble that was behind. This was your doing, your determination and strength that made that happen.

Yes the past few weeks were very hard, but as you documented and should read again, you fought the powers of indifference, you did what could be done and you never gave up and that is much to your credit as a human being full of the spirit of God.

Death is only sorrowful for the living and in that I share your sorrow because I do care for you despite never having looked into your eyes. Be assured though my dear friend that death is a temporary condition and when the time is upon us we will all rise to that place of no more trouble.

May you and your family now pull the oars in time, paddle in synchronous rhythm and bail out the canoe as needed.

Breathe, take your thoughts to the creator and find comfort there.

May great peace find its way to descend upon you.

Love

mark

Lori said...

Mark,

Thank you so much for always being here. I know I have a friend in you. I cry, than I laugh and than I cry some more. Jesse is taking this pretty hard. He saw everything. The man died at home in his bed, on the lake. I fought so hard for him Mark, than when I watched the EMT's I realized I was fighting for me Mark, he spiritually had left a few days ago. I know this now. No man should have had to suffer what he went through in these last days. It was inhumane. All these snide little snotty comments I make about rural living I was ashamed of yesterday. These local people poured to my home, strangers, to comfort me. The EMT's husband came on the call just because Kenny was a vet, and he too, was a veteran. Out of respect. The one fireman came back later, the first one who worked on him and brought me and Jesse a huge ham and pan of mac and cheese. I thanked him and was just amazed. He said "Ma'am this is how we do things down in the south". I know I made the right choice leaving Baltimore. The ending would have been much different. Mark, thank you for your words, poetry and kindness. Your writing provides much needed comfort and has been in the last few months. You would have really liked my husband. God Bless.

Pookie said...

Hi Lori,

I so wish I'd gotten there in time to meet him...the way you've always talked about him, and I remember how he tried to help me with the cable company and the crap they did to me...I'm so glad that he got away from here. This whole area is just such a cold, hard place, he didn't need to be here; and neither did you and Jess. You told me Saturday that you didn't think he'd make it, but if you think about it, he did make it, a long time ago. (You know what I mean.) You and he both made it out of hell in more ways than one, and he got to spend his last days with his family in a beautiful place. It's hard to find anything good in death, especially since we know so little for sure, but I think he's at peace now, even more so knowing that if he had to leave you, he left you in such a great place.

I'm always here if you need me.

Peace and Blessings to you both.

human being said...

the words are scant
and the picture too small
but
emotions abound
as
i can feel the love
through the choice of words
and
i leave this holy place
with tearful eyes...




may his soul rest in peace!




been here because of the walking man's words on his blog...

love and peace

Lori said...

Pookie,

I understand everything you wrote. He did accomplish all his final wishes in the end, and isn't that funny how you know exactly what I mean. I know you two only had spoken on the phone but he really thought the world of you, first when you sent me that postcard and than when you came through when real world people didn't care. He was still of the "my word is my bond generation". I look forward to having you here in the coming months. I love you...PS-Still have the post card in my scrapbook.

Human Being- Thank you for stopping by via The Walking Man..his words have always provided me comfort. Thank you for showing kindness from one human being to another. I posted a picture before he had gotten sick because that is how I want to remember him. Without all the gadgets of being sick. Again, thank you and have a blessed day.

Lou said...

Lori, I came from WM. I work in a hospital ER, and I see so many families insist that every measure be taken to keep their loved alive. Even if the measures are painful, and only result in more suffering. I learned early on I don't want this at the end of life. I gather your loved one made a decision to leave this world with some diginity, and near those he loved. It takes bravery from the sick, and from the family to make this choice. I would be at peace with the choices made.
God Bless, Lou

On a limb with Claudia said...

I was in this very same position with my father. All of my life, I thought - turn about is fair play, he inflicted suffering so shall he suffer. But I didn't have the heart for it. I couldn't stand his suffering.

I chose to end it for him. He'd never taken drugs - never. So I made sure they gave him morphine every 4 hours and a patch. He lasted about 3 hours.

And I still feel guilty.

Bless you in your journey. I'm certain he is resting well.

Lori said...

Lou- Thank you very much for stopping by. Kudos to you for having the strength and patience to work in an ER. I, too, don't believe in the insanity of keeping someone alive through means that are in the end, pointless. I learned that you are fighting to keep someone for youself, even though they might be ready to say goodbye. Thank you.

Claudia- Thank you so much for stopping by. I, too, have some issues with a mother who maybe should not have chosen not to have children. Don't feel guilty. Guilt weighs heavy. The compassion you chose to give in the end really was the best form of turnabout. It shows that in spite of it all, you are a compassionate, caring human being. Thank you.

Patricia said...

I'm so so sorry.

Meemaw