Today is a day of missing you...

It's one of those days. I realize when I turn around that you are not sitting on the couch, holding the remote. I was the computer chick, you were the t.v. dude. I miss spinning in my chair and seeing your face, the thick glasses and your salty colored hair. I miss the comfort of your presence, not talking, just being. I don't forsee me finding that anytime soon and I am not looking. My grief has turned more inward. I don't cry as much anymore. I keep you with me, privately. I still save all my dimes in your piggy bank. I have taken to sleeping on the couch again, because the bed seems much to big these days. I know you are not reading my blog, but I just want you to know that even though I no longer cry myself to sleep, I still miss you like crazy. Things just aren't the same in my world without you. I am trying, I promise, to hang in there. It was much easier when I was part of two, instead of just being one. Remember how when you used to sweat I would tell you how you smelled like glue? I miss that smell so much. I miss that little strawberry mark on the back of your head. The one I used to be careful with when I would shave your head. When someone dies, it is surprising the things you miss. It is the little things, for me at least. I put two more dimes in the bank today....