Apr 8, 2010

I just noticed..

Do you remember the first time you noticed your parent/s were aging and or old? It just hit me this morning with my mother. She now walks with a cane. It takes her two tries to get up from sitting down. She is now going to the hospital tomorrow for a catherization to check a blockage in her heart. I realized this morning that she just might not be around forever. Kenny always told me that no matter how much you might differ or argue with you mother, that once she is gone, it is an ache that lasts forever. I am learning to cope with grief. There are no words. I believe now that time is the only healer, no matter how trite that may sound. I find comfort in memories, songs and photos. I am now trying to prepare myself for the fact that my mother might only have but so many years left. My husband took me totally by surprise. I think that made it harder. Death came quickly, a thief that dashed in and out and took my heart. My mom is now talking about wills etc. I dread these conversations. I know they must take place. So for today I am trying to enjoy our time together and make each day count. Peace.


Kathy M. said...

I'm so sorry for the loss of your husband. How hard that must have been!

Yes, I do remember the moment with my own mom vividly. She has passed now, much too young. Time and recovery have helped me greatly come to terms with both her life and her passing. I'll keep you both in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs.

the walking man said...

You may not want to have the conversations but trust me it is best to have every arrangement settled before your mother is no longer able to make her own medical decisions and arrangements. Your doctor has forms for an advanced directive.

Lori said...

Kathy- thanks so much for your support. It is sad as your parents age that they become more like children. So I shall step up and take care of her.

WM- I agree..The conversations are painful but necessary. She wrote her will and I think she has peace of mind.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

I am dreading my parents ageing, as well. They are both in good shape right now, but I dread it in advance.

Love you lots. You have the right attitude about the situation, as usual.